True love is obedience and surrender and submission.
I love my God. My Father. My whole world in One! I love Him so much that I desire to serve Him and be used by Him and not live a sinful life. I was asked yesterday if I would classify myself as a sinner, afterall Jesus forgives us so then we're not sinners. I don't agree with that. I know that I am a sinner. I don't do it on purpose. I don't scheme. I don't purposefully tell lies. I don't hide things. But I am a sinner. I am human. I have human tendencies. I judge. I have mean thoughts towards others. I sometimes give into gluttony. I am selfish sometimes. I lust after things. I can be greedy. I can definitely be jealous. But I don't do it on purpose. I am a sinner but every time I sin, I am able to give my actions over to God and ask Him to teach me new ways.
Recently, I've been selfish. I've given into gluttony. God asked me to fast chocolate I thought. So, I haven't had any for a while. But oh how I was wrong. Every so often you know God is asking you to do a certain thing but you try and compromise. God says give $500 to a charity or person and you say well I have a car payment, I'll only give $20. God says to spend your time in a nursing home and you say you don't know anyone there so you watch t.v. God says write a book and you say that you never took writing class so you work at a retail store.
How often do we compromise submission to God's perfect plan? I was filing in the office today and the Holy Spirit convicted me so strongly.
What are you doing Tamara? Why haven't you obeyed me with this?
God, I'll start tomorrow. Just let me finish this.
Daughter, can't you feel what it's doing to you? Don't you see how you're hurting my temple?
But Dad, it's hard. I can't do it. I don't really want to do it.
You can do anything with Me. I'm calling you to a higher standard. You need the balance back in your life. Daughter, we need balance in order to make a difference for my children.
It's going to hurt. It's going to really suck. Dad, it's going to be hard. I don't know how to do what you're asking, so please help me. Be my strength. Be my support.
I'm with you in everything Sweet Girl. I never leave. You can do this. We can do this. Remember, I love you and everything I ask of you is for your good!
Okay, Dad. Whatever you say. I'll do it for you.
And thus, my new life begins. I am committed to following what my Dad asks of me. Back to balance. Back to the way God called me to live. What a change. But how awesome that my Dad can talk to me even when I'm at work, in the back room, putting files back! He's so Good!!!! I absolutely love Him!!!! (even when it hurts!)
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