And Girl and Her Sparkling Diamonds

As I laid back on those cement staircase that led to the second floor of the apartment complex I gazed, completely lost, at the sparkling diamonds in the night sky. My 11 year old heart yearning for answers and hope. I would sneak out of the apartment, leaving all the drama inside, and sit on those steps for what seemed an eternity. It was peaceful there, under the beautifully diamond decorated ceiling. No one was yelling at me for something I had done or didn't do. No one was touching me in places a girl of my age shouldn't be touched. And nothing was wrong in my life under that sky.

I saw shapes in the stars high above my world. And though I didn't know God very well, I felt Him under that sky. Who would think that you could see the stars in a big city in California? But God gave me the ability to see how much He cared for those diamonds in the sky. He placed our apartment in the back, away from the busy city streets with all their lights. I was able to sit on those cement steps and wish with all my heart that no one would notice I was outside and call me in.

Underneath those twinkling stars my little part of the world was safe and I knew God was with me on those steps. He whispered to my soul when I would visit Him there. He gave me strength to continue until our next meeting on the outside steps. He promised me everything would be okay and that things would get better. My little 11 year old soul knew that under the stars that sing God's praise she would be loved in a way she never knew was possible. The night sky became my refuge after the horribleness of my daylight hours.

Now, when I walk outside at night and am blessed with a clear sky and lots of sparkling diamonds, I know I am cared for and loved in a way that no one else can really show me. I dove into astronomy for a while because I was fascinated with the science behind these unbelievable creations. I even took a course at the planetarium one summer - escaping from my home life into God's world.

What I love about being a grown up now is that whenever that little girl is feeling the pain, I just look up into the diamond sky and feel the presence of God and I am filled with the hope and wonderment that she felt all those years and miles ago.  I am grateful for the dark canvas that God painted with sparkling diamonds just for me (and maybe you too)!